Tuesday, 22 March 2016

Desire salary increase? Be the Man in Suit!

Whenever I come across the sentence “We are all created equally!”, it amuses me and I’m sure it does you too. To think that I was born equally as those guys who consistently and incessantly adorn the first and top pages of the Forbes list, has always sent cold shivers down my spine. What am I missing? What am I not doing? What is the differential factor? But then, I say to myself “HP, you were not born with a Silver spoon” …and almost immediately, I remind myself that every great man has a story and most of them, if not all, were also not born  with a silver spoon.  Question then is, what is it about the Man in Suit? The figurative actually means “The Man-in-Charge”, “The Man at the helm of affairs” in organizations and establishments. How did they attain that height? At what point did the pendulum swing? Hold on, let me digress a lil….
Not every Man in Suit is actually a Success. The Man in Suit is not necessarily the most intelligent Man in an environment. We have a lot of them who have crash-landed and pro’ly a lot will still crash-land. I have my own personal Philosophy on that subject-matter, which is “Don’t tell me a man is humble until you have given him Power/Money and nothing changes about his attitude.” Most of those who have crash-landed are those who are only privileged to be the Man in Suit and actually didn’t work at it. Bottom line on my digression, not every Man in Suit is actually built up to attain that standard and not everyone of them has potential, hence they falter…

Back to the matter, the Man in Suit is actually not the most intelligent, most intuitive, idealistic and complete man in the Organization…rather, more often than not, it is the man at the corner of an office who’s probably too timid and feels or sees himself as inferior and therefore wasting away without focus.
A major attribute and characteristic of the Man in Suit is the ability to THINK, the ability to MEDITATE and come forth with something productive. Science calls that man Homo Sapien. Not all human actually do that. But try calling a learned individual Homo Erectus/Habilis and watch him/her rain insults on you. Everyone desires to be the Man in Suit, the man at the helm of affairs, but very few actually THINK of a better way of doing things or literally pushing the Organization forward. At establishments, people seek Promotion and Salary increase, but very few are actually making meaningful and intellectual contributions towards the progress of the Organization. Okay okay…maybe some think, maybe some meditate…but then what’s the outcome of your thoughts and meditations? Are they backed up by Actions?

Friends, there is a big difference between Ability and Functionality. Greatness lies in everyone, but only few who harness potential eventually becomes the Man in Suit. Do you want to be the Man in Suit, the Man in Charge, the man that controls, the man at the helm of affairs, do you desire to be seated in that Board meeting, helping to make important decisions? Then you gotta develop your mind by deep thoughts and consistent meditation. Those who meditate consistently are those who make the most of their productive mind…and they are the ones God can entrust wealth in their hands.
Don’t hide under Religion, Spirituality, Business, etc. You can be headed for the topmost top, you can be than Man in Suit…if only you make the decision to engage your mind productively and take actions towards the actualization of your thoughts.

Saturday, 21 November 2015

Abide in your Calling...Stay on your Lane

Let every man abide in the calling wherein he is called... - 1 Cor. 7:20, 2 Cor. 10:12

One particular event I love watching during the Olympics is the hurdles. I particularly love it because each competitor is assigned a lane and expected to maintain focus by staying on that lane and veering off means DISQUALIFICATION!
In life, every man is in a race… but not against peers. Every man has a race set before him. Those running same race (thesame Vocation/Career/Business) still have different lanes which brings it down to the barest individuality. A lot of people have seen life as a competition and I think our parents, teachers and society should take a chunk of the blame.

Education (School) has always been a platform to train your mind to be fit enough to handle life’s challenges, hence the Algebra, Geometry, History, Geography, Calculus, etc. However, the concept of prize-giving-days at end of sessions and “Best Student” nomenclatures has watered the ideology of Schooling. Many young lads now see life as a competition making it increasingly hard to stay on their lane. A huge percentage of people are now running another man’s race, thereby getting farther from fulfillment.
Prize-giving ceremonies do two unhealthy things to students:
1.     Enhances competition to be the better student thereby paying less attention to individual lane and race
2.     Causes dejection, depression and seeing yourself as a no-brainer hence not created to make the most of life (afterall, all fingers are not equal, they say).

Don’t get me wrong, I’m ALWAYS a prize winner at every prize-giving day, I was so blessed my parents don’t check my “report-card” except to see how much they are to pay for the next session, so my phobia for it is not because I don’t win, but because of the damage it does to peers.
I’ve been a victim too early in life, as I saw that “first” position as my birthright and therefore my classmates as competitors. It got so bad that in JSS2, I concluded I was going to be an Aeronautic Engineer all because the other guy leading the other class (JSS2A & JSSB) claimed that was his Career path. Whatever Aeronautic Engineering meant then, I knew not. I just saw it as the peak of our competition…except ofcourse when he ventured into Commercial class in SS1.

In modern days, in classrooms, place of work, the competition is very much alarming. Mr A just bought a Car, I must buy mine. Mr C has enrolled for a professional Exam, that’s my next move too. Until you know what you are created for, until you discover vision, life is yet to start for you. Life is a race at different pace for each individual. Don’t jump lanes and end up disqualified or being ejected prematurely from the race. A wise man once said, “Every man was born to exist, Living begins at the discovery of Vision irrespective of Age, Color or Background!”

My father is an Architect; I must become an Architect to run the family business. There are 12 Lawyers in my family; I’m going to be a SAN. Is that your lane? Is that your Vision?
It became much more pronounced to me in my 2nd year in the University in 2009. Computer Science is a very vast field and there are over 20 career paths in it. As the career paths were being unfolded to us, semester-by-semester, I began finding my bearing and channeling my path towards fulfillment. I knew Computer Science was not my end, but a means to an end for me, I followed on my lane doggedly. There were discouragements and interferences, but staying on my lane has been one thing I consciously do.
True Success begins when you accede to the fact that you’re not in a race against anyone (friends, colleagues, classmates, etc)…but against Time!
Let me just send out a plea to Parents, Teachers and Society…encourage and nurture potentials in those juveniles thrown into your custody and not to create an unhealthy competition between them. That competition mentality derails destiny faster than anything else…especially in a canny way.
As parents, we are Caretakers and not Life-controllers of our children. We’re meant to help them discover and nurture purpose and vision. Sports, Business, Academics, Art, Music, Industry, Health, Law, Oil & Gas, etc are just several areas in which that little one in your care might be created for. School should help train your mind in discovering and driving towards fulfillment in pursuit of Vision, veering off that lane is tantamount to running someone else’s race and living another person’s life eroding fulfillment and destiny.

While it is a good thing to reward diligence in students, it will be advisable to help discover, understand and nurture potentials in others especially at the very young and tender age.

Our world will be a better place when everyone stays on their lane and run their own race. Remember, true fulfillment is in walking or running or flying on your lane.

Monday, 12 October 2015

Life, Is not Chance...Don't live yours by Chance!

I was watching a movie titled “Adjustment Bureau” and my thoughts came alive about the subject matter called life and our travails in it. It is amazing how people struggle to accept the fact that there is a God up there who rules over and controls the affairs of men. Every building we know has a Master-plan drawn by the Architect and accepted by the Government before the actual structure is erected. The Master-plan is also referred to as the blueprint. Everyone walking the face of the earth has a blueprint for his/her life...a discovery and location of the individual’s blueprint is the first step towards true Success in life. Take note, Success is entirely different from good/true Success.
Life itself is a Matrix, twisted and wielded in such a way that without the one with the blueprint and Master-plan, veering off the path is imminent. There are, as I assume, questions running through your mind now. Questions like, the friends you encounter in life, the spouse you get entangled with, the family you are born into, the Career path you find yourself in, etc.

Quickly, I refer to some scriptural stories. According to their Matrix:
Ø  It wasn't in the master-plan that the Children of Israel will be carried away Captive into the land of Babylon. But the acts of King Hezekiah triggered such decision. II Kings 20:14-21
Ø  The Israelites were meant to spend 400years in Egypt and 40days in the journey to Canaanland from Egypt, but it wasn’t in the blueprint that they will spend extra 30years in Egypt and 40years in the wilderness journey. Exodus 12:40-41; 16:35
Ø  The lineage of Eli had the Master-planner’s stamp as the eternal priesthood of Israel, but it was never in the blueprint that the priesthood will be passed to the house of Elkannah at that point. I Samuel 3:11-14
One thing is common in the afore-mentioned stories and many others that space wont permit...the individuals involved made a choice which either delayed or terminated fulfillment of purpose. This means our choices can either make us veer off the Master-planner’s blueprint or cause a catastrophic turn out of events thereby terminating God’s blueprint for one’s life.
There are so many examples of catastrophic decisions that terminated destinies, examples like Jephthah (Judges 11:30-40), Samson (Judges 16:30), etc.
Point is, the blueprint of the Master-planner will always have a happy destination. Following His blueprint for your life has only advantages because we know that ALL things work together for good, to them that LOVE the Lord.
Friends, the cause of most of the  hardship you are facing is because you have veered off the blueprint for your life, a decision which renders you vulnerable to satanic manipulations and oppressions.
It’s about time we practicalize Carrie Underwood’s song “Jesus Take the Wheels”. Many of us need to retrace our steps and return to the One who has the blueprint of our lives, the One that cannot mismanage our lives, the One that can order our steps into fulfillment. Walking in His blueprint saves you the stress of designing your own blueprint, one you are not even sure of it’s validity and authenticity...because no one knows tomorrow except the Master-planner Himself.

The choice is yours, but I implore you to return to Him that is the author of the Matrix of your life, the One whose blueprint substantiates the fulfillment of your purpose. If it is not good, it is not God. God looked at everything He created and said it was good, very good. No defect, no mistake, nothing bad. If there is any symptom of bad in your life, check it, there is a likelihood you have veered off the blueprint of your life. God is interested in our ways, our paths, our thoughts, our everything, He has them all drawn out in His blueprint!

Wednesday, 30 September 2015

Nigeria Democracy/Independence: Worthy of Celebration?

October 1st 1960 will forever remain a day to be remembered in this country whether anyone likes it or not. Everyone likes freedom, no one wants to remain in captivity, hence the day we were emancipated from captivity will forever remain in memory. Even God ordered the Israelite to continually celebrate the feast of Passover, so we can in same manner see our Liberation from Colonial rule as an event worthy of celebration.

It therefore grieves me when year-in-year-out, I see and hear people say “there is nothing to celebrate about the Nation”, I can’t but marvel at the ignorance and naivety of such individuals. This is a country that has weathered a lot of storms, yet still standing together as one. Not even Polio, HIV/AIDS or Ebola has prevailed over this Country, a country other nations of the world envy so much. Friends, I cant imagine being the citizen of any other nation aside Nigeria.

Our problem in this country is neither the government nor those in authority so to speak, rather, our problem is largely individuals. An average American wakes in the morning and even before saying or thinking any other thing, his first thought/speech is “God bless America”. Those prayers have it’s significance on happenings around. When last did you say “God bless Nigeria”? When last did you do something to make Nigeria a better place? Rather, the buck of the blame is always passed to the government, when truth be told, some men cannot even successfully lead their home and family, some individuals cant even lead a football team, a class, a department, let alone a Local Government. Shift your gaze away from the government, think of what you can do for your country.

If the labour of our heroes past is not going to be in vain, what quota are you contributing to ensure that? Nigeria is growing, Think Positive, Say Positive, Act Positive, Stay Positive and continually Pray and take positive steps towards actualization of a better Nigeria.

A little leaven, the holy Scriptures says, leaveneth the whole lump…our individual efforts at our respective level and capacity towards a better Nigeria, when combined will make a monumental impact on the way forward for this Nation.

Have you observed that the second stanza of the National Anthem, which is the Prayer for the Nation, is even hardly sung these days, not even in social and societal gatherings where it is needed the most? I therefore close this write-up saying that prayer for my beloved nation:

O God of Creation, Direct our noble Cause, Guide our leaders right,
Help our youths the truth to know. In love and honesty to grow,
And live in Just and truth. Great lofty heights attain, to build a nation
Where Peace and Justice shall reign!

Nigeria is Rising and I'm definitely contributing my quota...So help me God!

Friday, 3 July 2015

Your Nickname...more than just a Name!

Names have a life-long impact on a man. All through the Holy Scriptures, whenever a special child is to be born, there were always specifics about the name of the child. John, Jesus, Jacob, Esau, Isaac, Samuel, etc. Notable figures in the scriptures have name specifics. It is a further validation of the impact of the names on the life of a child. Do you know a mother named her child Ichabod (I Samuel 4:21) and another named her child Jabez (I Chronicles 4:9)? What a Mum!
Thank God for we Africans that respect Culture to the letter when it comes to names. No real African goes by names like Carpenter, Price, Rice, Wood, Tiger, Rat, Green, etc.
However, there is a trend that is going viral these days – “Nicknames”! Everyone has a nickname now, don’t we all? If you don’t, you pro’ly haven’t been in an institution or a sociable environment for a significant period of time. You’re gentle, there’s a nickname for you. You’re outspoken, you got one. A slight facial/body deformity, you definitely got one. Some people no longer respond to their names as much as they do nicknames. People now refer to them using their adopted nickname absolutely and they respond almost absent-mindedly.

Names have an impact on destiny and nicknames are no exception. Yes, most of the nicknames originates from school (Primary, Secondary or Tertiary) and very often, there is little you can do about them especially as students continually enjoy it when you object to it the most. My nickname “holyparcel” is self-explanatory, but people still ask me what it means and the inspiration for it. The inspiration came at the advent of mail addresses earlier in the millennium. My sister and my friend opened mail addresses with the ids “portparcel” and “angelsparcel” respectively. I sat and thought for a season then came up with “holyparcel” which has stuck and has been significant over the years.
Bottom line, carve a name for yourself, a meaningful worthwhile name that you will be proud of and hold your head high to when called in a crowd. Jacob cried out for a new name (Genesis 32:28), Jabez did also (I Chronicles 4:10), who said names cannot be carved or changed? If you don’t give yourself one, a befitting one, people will soon give you a nickname, one you may not like and the more you object to it, the more it sticks and it more often than not answers in your life.

I observe people a lot much more than I talk. There was this lady back then in school that nicknamed herself “AforceToReckonWith”. I was thrilled the first time I saw it, but what’s more thrilling is the advent of events in her life ever since. I have closely monitored and I can say she’s going places in as much as she focuses and continues in her drive towards fulfillment. Your name or nickname is very paramount in how your life shapes up and the set of events that follows. You may not believe it and it may not look like it now, but it will surely tell at the long run.
Words and names have power over everything, natural or artificial…and the human life is no exception. Have you read Dr Masaru Emoto’s experiment on the effect of words and names on water? Read it up, it might thrill you a bit. www.masaru-emoto.net/english/water-crystal.html
Please, if you don’t like your name or nickname or you don’t even know what it means, ask around, if it’s not something palatable, it’s not too late for a Change of Name or Nickname.

Friday, 15 May 2015


I’m sure virtually everyone has heard this sentence at one point in time in life. If you haven’t, you probably haven’t had business within the four walls of an Institution, Bank, Organization, etc. It has become so commonly used that sometimes, you won’t even be heard out on your request/complaint before the bombshell is thrown at you “…drop it, come back for it next week!”
You visit a Bank…
You: Is my ATM Ca…
Cashier: Not yet, check back two weeks later.
See ehn, this life on its own, is not as complicated afterall, we complicate things ourselves. More often than not, the supposed thing you are asked to return a week later for, can actually be gotten in less than five minutes by someone else who pro’ly knows his/her way around.

My thots, why can’t we just be polite with everyone that comes our way, attending to people with respect and in a dignifying manner. I really must say, our manner of approach is degrading week-in-week-out. People just take pleasure in that sentence “…come back for it a week later!”
Banks ehn…I’m tired of those ones. Sometimes, when one considers the stress they put one through, you will seriously think of keeping your money at home. At least our grandfathers kept their valuables safely one way or the other. Let’s be frank, these banks never had our interest at heart. Banks have frustrated the life out of a lot of people. On our money o, they will even argue with you that your signature lacks comma or apostrophe. 

Have you observed that even Bank doors don’t usually want to let you in without a fuss if you’re coming for withdrawals? Whereas, it opens freely when you’re making a deposit.
Life will become a lot pleasant if we all mellow on the subject of protocols and attend to people in a dignifying manner. Show people courtesy and respond to them positively and promptly too. Even the Holy Scriptures supports me on the subject matter. Proverbs 3:27-28.
I was doing Clearance at a point in an Organization and after making haste and almost sweating like droplets of blood, I met the departmental head on his way out. Guess what he said…well your guess is as good as mine, the fact he knows me doesn’t even count to him.
See, I’m tired of that phrase. What exactly is it all about? A show of Superiority?  ...of Class? …of Brittleness? …of Defiance? Iono really!

Secretaries? Huh…that’s on another level. Secretaries play a huge role in the Success-drive of an Organization and on the other hand, they have done a lot of havoc, sank organizations, crippled destinies, etc. The boss is in his office having a great time at work, but all because the Secretary is having a bad day or too much work on her desk, he/she decides no one will see the Boss that period. I’ve been a Secretary myself to high-profile individuals at certain points in my life and I know sometimes, truly, the boss doesn’t want to see people. Truth is, Secretaries add their own. Their ‘Aseju’ is too much. Doing beyond what they have been sent, stopping Job seekers from seeing the Boss.
There is this Network Communication advert where a group of upcoming artiste were trying to give the CD of their Solo to a Producer to hear them out…and the Secretary was blocking them from gaining access. Not until they maneuvered their way to his rooftop window…were they able to get to him and guess what, he loved the Solo and signed the group.

Bottom line, let’s just learn to do good in life and be responsive to our fellow humans. Have respect for humans and value their time. They also left something to come to your office, it isn’t for leisure, it’s for a concrete purpose…attend to them with all sense of dignity and decorum.

Monday, 13 April 2015


When I hear the horn of my Dad’s car returning home in the night when I was between the age of 8 and 10, it usually send cold shivers down my spine. I naturally don’t think about the goodies he has bought on his way back home, on the contrary, my mind immediately starts playing the next 2-gruesome-hours that is always about to unfold. On entering the apartment, first, he enters his room, takes his bath while Mum sets the dinning. Immediately he is done eating, the escapade unfolds. Oh…how I love Saturday and Sunday evenings when the drama doesn’t unfold.
Lemme drive home my point. See ehn, my Dad is a lover of Music and he also happens to be one of the pioneer Choir Director of the Gospel Apostolic Church when they moved their Headquarters to Soluyi, Gbagada, Lagos State. Well, to my Dad, that inadvertently meant every of his children must be a lover of music and maybe find a Career in it. I’m still wondering why none of us took it as a Career.
Back to the 2-hour gruesome lectures, my Dad started a Music school in our sitting room having the first 3 of his children as the pioneer students, he later extended the tuition-free-gesture to neighbors and their children that showed interest. We all had notebooks and textbooks. Up till the age of 8, wetin concern me with music? All I ever desired as a hobby was football and video games which I was proficient at. Every night of the week (with the exception of Saturday and Sunday), it was music tutorials and lectures, sol-fa notes cramming, G-clef, F-clef, string and other notes. At the end of the month, there were tests and exams and there was Prize giving day for successful students too. I trudged along at first and sometimes, I liaised with my Mum feigning sickness and evading classes to which Mum obliged (I was Mum’s favorite – what do you expect?).

All those while, little did I know something was brewing up in me. To me, I don’t listen to Music the way modern day youths do. It’s more than the dance, the beats, the vocals, the noise to me. It’s about intent, melody, compere, sol-fa notes, musical notations, lyrics and how they combine to lift the soul.
Now that I have some people’s attention, let me state it clearly, not everyone in the music industry is really called into that ministry. What is the essence of Music when it cant lift the spirit and energize the soul. The Music archangel himself (Lucifer) was created and designed for that sole purpose. David played musical notes and the evil spirit disappeared out of King Saul. These days, Music ironically invite evil spirit (so to speak). Music is meant to be spirit-lifting, soul-energizing and body-jerking.

I’m addicted to Music, great songs. Now, before you say “Me too” in your mind, think about it. What’s it with Music for you? The dance? Noise? Beats? Melody?
Music is life, beautiful notes does more to the human mind than can be expressed or uttered. I’m so into Music…I’m not a musician (I don’t even play any musical instrument except the Flute and Drum Set), however, I love Music, good and soul-lifting Music.
Tell me your kind of Artiste and I will tell you what you love in Music. For me, Artistes like Don Moen, Sinach, Chris Delvan Gwamna, Kirk Franklin, Cece Winnas, Juanita Bynum, Michael W. Smith, Third Day, Celine Dion (I know this will raise eyebrows) and a few others are my kinda artiste.

Music has a great effect on me…I find it hard being in the Terrestrial under the atmospheric condition of the ministration of the afore-mentioned artistes. I instantly translate to the Celestial.
There are three basic songs that I don’t get tired listening to amongst others. I can listen to these songs uncountable times in a day. With these songs played in my home, my wife and children will get practically anything even up to the whole of my kingdom or bank account (under the right conditions tho). The songs are:
My Offering                                    -           Third Day
Power in the name of Jesus             -           Jesus Culture
Enter the Holy of Holies                 -           Paul Wilbur
Music is more than I can describe or utter. Music is life. I love Music, I love musical notes, I love entertainment. The feeling and effect is just… *LipsSealed*

What is music to you?

Tuesday, 17 March 2015

I am looking for a Man...

In modern times, the major quest in the society is the quest for "a man"! Everyone is looking for a man - to blame, to claim, to connect them to someone in power, help them make ends-meet, a father-in-law's last-name, a man to become their leader, etc. A lady is looking for a man, ironically, a man is looking for a lady & another man. To COMPLICATE and further SIMPLIFY matters, God Himself is looking for "a man"! Something therefore must be missing somewhere. Why is everyone looking for a man? Where is the man? Where has he gone to? When is he returning?
Enough questioning! Enough searching! Enough brainstorming on the subject matter! You are that man everyone is looking for! You are that individual God is looking/waiting for. Stop the blame-game, the claim-game, famzing-game, connection-game. Stop the games, the gimmicks, and take responsibility. You seek a better world, don't wait on the world leaders. You seek a better nation, don't wait on the President. You seek a better Organization, don't wait on the GM or Director. You are that CHANGE everyone desires. You are that man you are looking for. Our problem in the Nation at this present time is that "There is no Man" to take up the reins. No man has equipped himself competently enough to step into the ring!

People keep looking out for the wrong things and wrong people to make things happen, when all it really takes to make things happen is YOU! There is no 'ordinary vocation', it is the ordinary mindset of the handler that makes a vocation look ordinary. Anyone on demand presently in this world, is one that has found a secret, traded such secret, and has become a Success in that sojourn. A failure is never sought after, never a good reference point, never reckoned with. What then differentiates a man sought after from one just making a living? The differential factor is a Secret! One has found and traded with a Secret. However, if you find a Secret, but do not trade with it, it is as good as dead and non-referential. How then can I become the man everyone is looking for? SELF-DISCIPLINE is it! 
Self discipline is what uplifts a man. Without it, destiny is eroded. When do you want to be sought after? When do you want the world to come after you? When do you want to be the man both God and humanity are on the lookout for? Now is the time, Self-Discipline is the demand, Responsibility is the price.
There is a demand on anyone who wants the World Binoculars focused on him. How then can I meet up with the demands of Self-Discipline? How can I pay the price of Responsibility? Self-Discipline rides on the wings of two major wings amongst others, and they are both hinged on Time Management. The capital index of Self-Discipline is Time Management. You will remain thesame mediocre you are for years unending but for two things - the BOOKS you read and the COMPANY you keep. These two wings are the demands of Self-Discipline and the Responsibility it requires upon which Success thrives.
BOOKS: Invest in Self-Development. B.Sc/M.Sc is just an indication that you are literate, nothing more. A Certificate is just the initiation into the world of knowledge gathering. Unfortunately, many see it as the life-line for making a living. Indiscipline can make your first-class void of dignity. Presidents are sought after today not because they were the best graduating students (most of them don't even have a degree), but because of the potentials and knowledge they have garnered since graduation. Certificates don't solve life problems, knowledge does. Go for knowledge, and more knowledge, then you become a focal and reference point.
COMPANY: The effect of Healthy Relationships on a destiny cannot be over-emphasized. 

A choice of responsible association is what makes a man sought after. No one goes to a Mechanic workshop to seek medical attention. As a Medical Doctor, if you keep company with Motor Mechanics, sitting & gisting with them, you can never be a reference point! Wrong/Evil association will always corrupt good destinies. Keeping company of those who violate Rules and Regulations, those who usurp authorities, will make you lose relevance as fast as possible. Respect higher authority. No matter how highly-placed you are, there will always be someone higher than you. Walk, Relate, Associate will only Self-Disciplined individuals, those who are on the pedestal of higher grounds and you will soon see yourself being sought after.

Self-Discipline is very essential in your quest for Time Management. Don't spend time, buy it, invest it...else you pay a higher price for it tomorrow.

Now, are you still looking for a man?

Thursday, 2 October 2014


Everyone living on the face of the earth was born on a certain day which makes it safe to say everyone has a birthday. Although not everyone knows it, acknowledges it or even celebrates it, it still doesn’t undermine the fact that they have birthdays.

The primary essence of birthdays therefore is to apply our hearts unto wisdom. By this, I mean birthdays naturally should be days of reflections for the celebrant and also those celebrating with him/her. Yes, one cannot take away the merriment, celebration, champagne popping et all, and as I humorously say often “Your birthday is your happiest day on any social networking platform”, a day when enemies, friends, neighbors, old colleagues and well-wishers storm your Wall, inbox, Timeline, DM, etc and decorate them with posts and delightsome wishes some of them almost drawing you to tears while you Giggle over others.

More importantly, now that it’s your birthday is the need to apply your heart unto wisdom, Reflections! Reflecting on the Faithfulness of God in and out of Season. Have you imagined if we have to do these?

  • ·         Queue at the filling station to get oxygen for our breathe, just imagine!
  • ·      Everyone had a monthly allocation of oxygen, using it up before the end of the month indicates being inactively dead till the next month’s allocation, just imagine!
  • ·         Imagine staying healthy for a month requires #25m at the most friendly hospital, just imagine!

Friends, Man is too expensive to be managed by man. Certain things just cannot be put in man’s care, the world will suffer for it. Therefore as you celebrate daily, weekly, monthly and annually on earth, apply your heart unto wisdom as you reflect on God’s faithfulness over the years, because Reflection is the authentic fuel of celebration.

Reflection on your birthdays should be two-dimensional;
ü  Reflect Appreciatively: Just like in the natural, when you thank man for something done for you, he replies with “Don’t Mention!” but we all know what would have happened if you hadn’t mentioned it. He would have labeled you an ingrate. Much more with God, if not for anything but for the fact that you have breathe in you and you are not on the hospital bed, appreciate God.
ü  Reflect Anticipatingly: When we look at the past and see the Faithfulness of God, we can confidently look into our future. Look into that colorful and glorious future ahead and celebrate God for it.

Therefore, as you celebrate:

Look Back:                   Too many numerous acts of God in your life.
Look Up:                      He is still doing it presently…

Look Forward:             To the colorful and glorious destiny He has for you.

Wednesday, 27 August 2014


The quest to look good...well, no be today the thing start. Man had always strove to look good and will always do. The part that culture is playing in this aspect of life is very vital and strategic. What is regarded a mode of dressing in a particular culture may actually be a taboo in another, hence this has made it difficult to carve out a niche as a generally accepted way of dressing, modesty being our only lifeline. With dressing obviously comes Fashion as I am yet to see or hear a Fashion sense in existence without a form or piece of clothing on. Dressing in this context therefore involves all forms of appearances, ranging from hairstyles, headgears, clothes, footwear, etc.
Have you imagined that having to attend 2 occasions in a day, you might be applauded at one event and almost stoned at the other because of your appearance...there is therefore a thin line between Fashion and Craziness. Okay, enough dilly-dallying, let me hit the hammer on the nail straight up.
I happen to serve in a Unit where I have the privilege of seeing worshippers as they alight from their Cars or Buses and walk into the Church auditorium...and this post is actually my thots on what I have seen over the years. Even if God looks at the heart, don’t you know you should appear before Him with all sense of moderation? You won’t even be allowed to see the LG Chairman, Governor let alone President with some mode of dressing supposedly termed ‘Fashion’. First, I start with the gentlemen...cos I can easily be done with them in a jiffy.
The major Fashion/Craziness boundary for guys is the hairstyles and pants (trousers). Guys need to know that they are not footballers and even the footballers don’t wear those crazy hairstyles after major tournaments. How can you put up a hairstyle making you look like Ogre or Dracula? It depicts irresponsibility. Go outside your homes with all sense of decency and moderation. And finally, with guys, I thought they have rung the bell on Sagging over and over again? There is nothing glorifying in sagging, absolutely nothing! I mean...just think about it for a minute and tell me you see what I’m saying. I rest my case...a word, they say, is enough for the GUYS!
Now Ladies! Ladies!! Ladies!!! Choi! Where do I start from? I won’t talk about your hairstyles cos that can take eternity, so I start from facial appearance with some obvious rhetorical questions.
Ø  Why scrape your eye-lashes off and start drawing as if you are sponsored by Nike?
Ø  Why paint your face with Water-color making your face appear like a fine art drawing book?
Ø  Why pierce your nose and lips as if you are possessed by a demon?
Ø  Why use earrings that can be used in the gym to build muscles on your fragile ears?
Ø  Why paint your lips as if it’s a paint manufacturing factory?
Next, I go to the footwear and I really must plead with ladies at this point. Have you ever checked a lady’s handbag? There is a 95% chance that you are going to find one plimsoll or slippers in there. Ladies need to know that not every shoe you see belongs to you, no matter how much it’s pleasing to you, just look away and buy footwear that make you comfortable. The quest for high heels and to feel among is alarming. You see ladies walking as if they have boils on their legs or feet, and they always walk in pairs...as support for one another. The footwear that is naturally meant to stabilize you now becomes something making you dangle on the street.
Coming back to the pants, don’t y’all have a mirror in your rooms? You inconvenience yourself so much on the street that you continually use one hand to pull down your skirt as you walk along the road. Which prompts the question, didn’t you know the skirt was short when you wore it in your room? It’s craziness, I think, to dress to inconvenience yourself just to supposedly please people on the street. I wrote supposedly because the truth is, we are actually not pleased, rather, we see so much discomfort written all over your face, and the sight is not pleasing at all.

I can go on and on, but I think moderation is key in everything we do. Please be moderate. Place your comfort over any other thing or person or situation. Don’t cross that thin line between Fashion and Craziness. Dress Fashionably tho!

Thursday, 31 July 2014


...and God Almighty said “...it is not good for man to be alone, I will provide him an help meet for him...” That was the Almighty, just immediately after creation has been confirmed good, very good. He affirmed that the only thing not good about creation as at that period, was man being alone...even God Himself is not alone, forever with God the Son, the HolySpirit, 24 elders, host of Angels, etc...He has companions. So it’s safe to tell that friend of yours forming James Bond or Angelina Jolie...having the “I can do all myself” attitude to calm down and find a suitable shoulder to lean on.
Truth is everyone needs a shoulder to lean on, note, I didn’t say cry on, but lean on! Quickly let me spell it out, Companionship is a twisted form of Friendship, but they are never thesame thing. The Oxford dictionary defines both thus:
Companion: A friend, acquaintance or partner, someone with whom one spends time and keeps company.
Friend: A person other than a family member, spouse or lover whose company one enjoys and towards whom one feels affection.
Companionship is a craving of the soul of everyone, and the first step to living a life worthwile is embracing Companionship. It is a term that qualifies someone walking with you heading the way you are headed. God has designed us in such way that we all need companionship, a shoulder to lean on. Nobody succeeds in isolation! As a matter of fact, it has been observed that the major cause of suicide, depression, mental retardation, etc is lack of companionship (Loneliness) or wrong companionship. There is a craving in every man to relate, to pour out, to socialize, to interact, to communicate, to confide...this craving has however caused as much damage as it has caused good too. Therefore, in our quest for companionship, caution has to be taken.
In order not to muddle things up, I will be explicit as it relates to Singles and Couples, because Companionship with Singles definitely differs from that of the Married.
As Singles...
...the crave for companionship amongst Singles is very much on the high. The urge for exploration coupled with the crave for companionship has led some to Success and many others to doom. As Singles, control is a key factor here. Not all your friend can be your companion. As much as you yearn for shoulders to lean on, be selective! Lean only on shoulders of those going in your direction in life. Friendship, and indeed Companionship is by choice never by imposition. Choose your Companions wisely. If you are not benefitting productively from a friendship, there is no point making such a one your companion. I once heard a story of how a brother missed his flight simply by talking to a wrong companion at the Airport. They called his flight at departure time, and just because the companion he was with at the Airport was also holding an Arik ticket, he thought they were both headed thesame way. Your future and vision is much more important than that companion you have stuck with. Place value on your future and disassociate from everyone and anyone not going your direction.
For the Married/Engaged...
...here, it is a different ball game. It is unfortunate that many couples are missing out on this purpose of Marriage. Even though some couples dwell together under thesame roof, constant quarrels and rancour pull them kilometres apart; so they live together, yet alone. True companionship will add meaning to your marriage. Your spouse is not just to be your roommate, but your closest friend. Your spouse ought to be your first and best consultant and associate in all things. Protecting family unity and development is then non-negotiable. Family is so essential as the school of virtues par excellence. If companionship in families is functional, bad things will decrease and good ones increase. Your spouse is your best companion; no one else should come into the circle. If we do not protect the family institution, we will be completely finished. As the saying goes with emphasis of mine, if you marry the right person (and make him/her your companion), you are complete, if you marry the wrong person (whether you make him/her your companion or not), you are finished. But if you marry the right person and you have made another (wrong one) your companion, then you are completely finished.
No one succeeds in isolation, embrace companionship today...however, make it with the right person!